The Love Trip – Part 3: I love him, he loves me not, he loves me, I love him not...
From Hampi, to Bangalore, to Mysore, to Coorg, I was falling for him. Hard.
We woke up groggy. I didn't get any sleep because it was weird sleeping platonically next to someone whose frat-house friends were constantly egging him on to – bang that chick! Bang that chick! Bang that chick!
We got on to the bus to Kerala. Our destination was Kottayam. We decided we'd up our budget a little because the last place was hell. A few hundred more wouldn't kill us. The bus ride was quiet. It was upsetting for me. I was having some of the most amazing conversations I've had in my life with Aidy, and now this little pause was disturbing. Were we over? What did I do? We weren't anything anyway, stop over thinking it Meetali... maybe he’s just tired.
Good news (for me), he was sick.
He was bitten by an insect before we got on the bus, and now he was feeling very uneasy. Soon he had a rash all over his body. His skin was burning. I promised him a nice massage to help relieve him of this pain.
Our home for a day
Our homestay was a small cute place a few metres away from the ocean. We could hear the waves non-stop. The beach was pretty much our own, not a soul in sight. Aidy took a shower as soon as we entered to try and alleviate the burning sensation and didn't want to join me in the water. Who said he had an option? I pulled him in and we swam and ran, and played in the sand like we were 10. Or I was 15 and he was 10. The age bit was playing on my mind now that I was falling for him. But if Tendulkar could do it. So could I.
That evening, a few drinks down, Aidy reminded me of the massage I promised earlier. I delayed it, knowing full well what a massage might lead to. But then again, when we were in bed about to sleep, he reminded me. And so, I gave in. It's not that I didn't want to. I'd been dying to get my hands on this beautiful young man for weeks now. But I was afraid of it too. I tried to keep the massage as un-sexy as possible.
But, there was a happy ending.
Yay or nay?
Or a confused ending really. Mid-massage, Aidy turned around, pulled me and kissed me. “The moment I saw you, back in Mumbai, I wondered what it would feel like to do this.”
“Well now that you know, let's go to bed,” I cut him short. I wasn't mad. I wasn't upset. I even smiled myself to sleep. I just didn't want things to get out of hand for me. I was already thinking of a life with Aidy. A pipe dream that would never be fulfilled. I wasn't going to get physically involved as well. Plus, I was on my period.
Read the full series here: The Love Trip
The next morning, I woke up stressed about what had happened. Aidy on the other hand, was in pehla nasha mode. He looked at me starry eyed. He kissed me good morning. He hugged me every chance he got. I couldn't help but smile. Smile all the way to our next stop – Cochin.
Cochin was the city the both of us fell in love with! Pretty architecture, amazing food, chilled out cafes and a lovely little beach, that was just a bit overcrowded.
That night Aidy pulled me closer and tried to go for another kiss. This time I stopped. “Meetali, you hold me, you hold my hand, you cuddle with me, you sleep on me, you do all of this and don't expect me to want you? Stop the hypocrisy,” he bitingly told me. He was right. I had a dirty double standard. I could do and get away with anything I wanted, but he couldn't. But of course, I wasn't going to admit he was right.
I left the room and stepped out for a smoke. A few minute later, Aidy followed. He apologised. He told me how he was being selfish about wanting to make out. He told me how all the touchy-feely stuff we do all day made him want me more and more. But he promised to try.
He asked me to come back in to sleep. We cuddled. Again, because I wanted it. I woke up the next morning and spent what could have been an hour just looking at Aidy's face. His face was so calm. I woke him up with a peck on the lips. Which soon turned into a proper, proper, kiss. And that led to...
The worst sex ever.
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By Meetali Meshram
Photographs by Meetali Meshram